Jersey Girl, Texan Heart: A Letter To The People of my Past

A Letter To The People of my Past

11:05 AM

Let me start off by saying that this post is to thank the people of my past who haven’t made it to my future and have shaped me to be the person I am today.  I’ve seen a lot of articles about writing a letter to an ex or a letter to an ex’s new significant other, but I haven’t seen one saying thank you to the people who haven’t made it to the present or future.  So, I decided that I would do this.  My life has really changed for the better over the past few years and it’s thanks to my past, here goes.

Dear people of my past who didn’t make it to my future,

I want to thank you.  It is a sincere thank you.  My life turned out the way it did because of you.  This is not just towards my exes who made me more appreciative of my boyfriend now, but the friends who left my side when I needed them most.  I NEEDED you at one of the worst times in my life a few years ago and you decided to turn your back on me.  Some of you I even knew since I was in second grade.  I gave you many chances in our friendship to change your ways but you didn’t.  Instead you disappointed me the worst out of everyone.  You disappointed me more than any ex I’ve had.  Boys come and go at the age that we were but friendship should be forever.  You decided to go along with the rest of the group when you didn’t even have the full side of my story. 

I’ve learned from each and every one of the people that I am no longer in contact with.  Whether it be good or bad I did learn.  Life threw many curveballs for a few years and when I finally hit rock bottom with no one to turn to (family can only help so much because you don’t want to tell them EVERYTHING you’re feeling, sometimes the truth from them really hurts) I realized what it truly means when someone says “what doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger.”  I learned a lot from my exes as well.  I learned what I want and don’t want in a man.  I don’t resent my exes.  Of course there were many issues with two of them that I just felt like I wasn’t worth anything or deserved any better because why else would fate lead me to be with someone like that but when it was good, it was really good.  However, when it was bad, it was extremely bad.  They taught me to be appreciative and cherish the nice guy that would eventually come into my life.  I just had to experience the bad boy and the issues that came with that first.

A few years ago is when my life changed for the better.  I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself and stopped blaming all of the people who hurt me and pulled myself together.  I decided that I experienced all of that for a reason.  I faced all of those hardships to mold me into who I am today.  In my present day I am happier, I believe in the little things that count, I’m appreciative of the few people I have in my life, I am closer with my family, and I have the best boyfriend.  I appreciate my life and I value the relationships and friendships I have.  I’m much closer with my parents which there was a point in time where it was a constant fight every day because they only wanted what was best for me and I stood up for these people who I believed were my “ride or die.”  I learned a lot in those few years.  Just because someone treats you a certain way it doesn’t mean you should feel sorry for yourself and mope in your own misery.

YOU HAVE A CHOICE.  You have the ability to say when you’ve finally had enough.  You can make the decision to leave and never look back.  That is what I did.  I distanced myself from the people who mistreated me and three years later I’m the happiest I’ve been in my life.  Even though my circle has decreased significantly, I only surround myself with people I cherish and know cherish me.  I surrounded myself with positive and inspiring people. 

So, I wanted to thank you.  Thank you for all of the good and bad.  Don’t get me wrong, I will cherish the good memories I have because I don’t want to hate you.  I want to remember you as a part of my old life.  I don’t want to remember you as a bad person.  Even though I may not like you now, and would never have you in my life again I don’t want to hate you.  I may ignore you if I ever see you in person, but I don’t want to hate you.  I want to remember you for the person I once knew, not the person you became.  Whether you are an old friend(s) or an ex this letter is written towards you.  Thanks to our time together you helped make me who I am today.  You made me overcome a lot of bad things and you were even there to help me through some of it.  I cherish everything in my life now BECAUSE of you.  I may not have gotten the new chance at a better life if it wasn’t for you.  There was a time that I wished the worst for you and thought of you as an enemy that I would hate forever, however I don’t wish the worst.  I don’t wish you to go through what I had to go through. I can’t intervene with whatever Karma decides though.  That is when the universe will decide what you truly deserve.  I hope you eventually find the happiness that I found because it is an amazing feeling.

Thank you for everything.



P.S.  I also want to thank my parents and brother for being there to help me.  You will never understand how much I owe you for being there.  You dealt with me at my worst and loved me unconditionally regardless of anything that happened in my life and for the things that I said.  I am extremely lucky to have you in my life, I can’t begin to express how lucky I am.  There is nothing in this world that can make up for how you helped me.  You were there when I hit rock bottom, and you were there to help me survive.  You are still there to this day even if it’s to talk about a bad day.  I love you mommy, daddy, and baby brother.


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  1. I was just talking to a frind about this yesterday, how there are so many people that on one time were so important and now are just someone I know, it is amazing how everyone touch us in it own way and how our life changes because of this, this is a very good and sincere letter, makes me realize how thankfull I am also with this ones who are not in my present anymore but were once a strong part of my past.

  2. I was in a terrible place a few years ago. It is a long story that doesn't need to be told to say that I can really relate to this post. I have people that I assumed would always be a significant part of my life. But they aren't. I was hurt. I was disappointed. But I cherish the memories and am a better person for the experiences. Sounds like you are too.

  3. What a beautiful perspective in life! While most people look back on their past with regrets and bitterness, you drew so much inspiration. I could also use this perspective at a challenging point in my life :)

    Abby of Life in the Fash Lane


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